Don't mess with my magic...

It's hard to believe but it's already been one month since Super Boy and I hopped on a plane and went to Disney. Everyone one who went, from (the now slightly more likable) Gavone to my sisters Lady Diva and Weasel, from my mom and dad to my cousin, Opossum, and Aunt Squeak, everyone still raves about how much fun it was, how incredible the adventures, and how soon we must return.

In fact, it was a frequent topic of discussion this weekend when we were all reassembled at my parents home for a family weekend celebrating Weasel's graduation. And in between looking at pictures (again and again) and reliving our glory days in the sun, we also had some rather philosophical discussions on propriety, manners, and what is appropriate when in public.

The conversation centered on the final day we spent in Disney, spent mostly in the Magic Kingdom. It was the appointed "Gay Day" at the park; LGBTQ individuals, family and groups  had spent the week in the surrounding area outside the park and help events in Disney and elsewhere, a sort of meet and greet vacation. That day it was a trip to the Magic Kingdom they planned, and thousands of people in red shirts (the color of the day, I assume, there's no other explanation) poured off the monorail and into the park.

Other than the increased crowd, it usually wouldn't have bothered my family in the least. When you live in a family like mine, you tend to have a very relaxed "live and let live" mentality about these kinds of things. It would even be worth mentioning if it hadn't been for the shirts.

Those red shirts. Some of them have really cute saying on them, like "I believe in fairies!" But others were, if not offensive, then at least incredibly inappropriate in a children and family friendly environment. Some said things like "Fag" and "Hag," which would be difficult to explain to a child, but others were outright and blatantly sexual, like "Single: form line in rear" and "Big Bear Boy" (not explaining that one, look it up yourself).

 Here's the issue: Your business is your business, but when you are out in public, especially at a place like Disney, which is specifically designed for children and families, you need to keep in mind what's appropriate for the situation. Night club? Wear the leather chaps. Disney? Stick to the glittery fairy wings and magic wands.

My biggest hang up about all this? I wish I had wings like that...

What you need to know about your physician assistant student...

I'm fairly certain I've mentioned the Super Boy is studying to become a physician assistant but I never told you that he's a blogger, too. In fact, his blog on pre-physician assistant students has become quite popular in some circles!

While offering unique insights into the student experience, however, he has neglected to discuss what the experience is like for those around them, especially family and significant others. This, I feel, warrants some information,explanation and advice on my part, as I am very well aware how grueling this program can be...

You'll be alone even if you are sitting in the same room as your student. This might be the hardest part. A student can be so focused on their work for hours at a time, every night for weeks, until you might as well be in a room by yourself. You might also get more conversation by talking to yourself, too. I haven't found a good way to combat this feeling yet, but I think it's worth knowing about. The best advice I can offer on this point is to make sure our student sets aside some time for activities that you both enjoy and can participate in without thinking about your workloads. Quality time is scare, so use it wisely!

You'll be taken for granted, even if they don't mean to. I have seen Super Boy take a plate of dinner I'd spent hours making and start to tuck in without ever taking his eyes off of his computer screen and his radiology scans. He'll drop dirty scrubs and clothes and books all over the apartment I'd spent all day cleaning. And yeah, it makes me mad, but I know he doesn't mean to do it. His head is so full of pharmacology, H&P's,  and anatomy that he's drained at the end of the day and blind to a lot of the little things that are happening in the background. Try not to take it too personally, but gently point these things out if they are really bothering you.

Be patient and supportive with your student, but don't hesitate to give them a swift and loving kick in the pants if they start to get snippy with you or too critical of themselves. It takes a lot of faith to wade through all the dysfunction, and you need to be there to act as a guinea pig for their physical exams, quiz-masters for flashcards and general cheerleader when their spirits get down. But it's just as important they you do not let them take their frustration and anxiety out on you, and it's counter productive to let them beat up on themselves. Be firm, positive, honest and assure them that everything will be okay.

The good times will be really good. I know I might sound like this is a miserable, heartbreaking program, and some days it can be, but when things are good they are really good. For instance, when Super Boy and I were in Disney World, we were so deliriously happy and spent every moment together. The fact that the week was sandwiched between very busy weeks made it all the more special. You can expect every day to be a fairy tale, but the fairy tales you do have are extra sweet!

I hope this gives some comfort and insight to those who love physician assistant students, and who knows? Maybe I'll get Super Boy to be a guest blogger and offer his side of the story...

Creation and Inspiration

I am back from a incredible week in Disney World (posts to follow!) and I am now inspired to get active and make something. I am trying to keep criminology off the brain and unwind with other, more relaxing, pursuits. Namely, I have recently begun creating and "upcycling" (recycling, updating and improving existing pieces) jewelry pieces.

In addition to making a necklace and a locket for myself, I have just ordered beading supplies and metal findings to start creating original hat pins! This first line of products will be marketed on Esty at the Daughter Of the Roses shop and will be called "Itsy Bitsy Spyder," as it is my first and "elementary" attempt at creating art for sale!

Featured above is the logo that Super Boy created for me. I drew a sketch on a crumpled Post-It, and he turned it into art. Thank, hun!

Updates to follow as the supplies arrive and, of course, obligatory sales pitches...

Moment of Joy

The day is near! It might seem silly or juvenile, but for my family Disney World truly is the happiest place on earth. And this Saturday we are on our way...

Super Boy and I are particularly  excited to go; it's not just a vacation to us. It's not just pop culture and cartoon characters. It's more than just hanging by a pool or going on rides. To us, it's symbolic in a way, as ridiculous as it may seem. It's about our families, and happiness, and laughing. It's about silliness, pure joy, and leaving stress and worries behind, if only for a few days.

For us, Disney brings together all of the best things of life...

So while we pack, beg our friends for rides to and from the airport, and checking and double checking our flight status, we keep one things in mind: we're going to the happiest place on earth, and for a few days, all the world is right!

Not many days left...

Serving the State: the perils of jury duty

I often joke about how I am not ready to be a grown up and I'd much rather hide under my bed all day. I am without a doubt 5 years-old at heart, and I'd like nothing more the spend the first few days of summer vacation in my pajamas eating ice pops and watching Disney movies. Unfortunately, in the eyes of the state at least, I am  most definitely a grown up and therefore I am required to serve the state in the most irritating and mind numbingly boring ways possible.

I am now eligible to sit as a juror.

In an incredible stroke of irony, I was called to serve on a jury today, just days after I finished my last exam.The little form came in the mail, and, under penalty of being held in contempt of court, I went to the county courthouse this morning and settled in for a long, boring day. Summer break would just have to be put on hold. Armed with snacks and a few novels, I watched the criminal justice system unfold in front of me, and boy is it ugly.

To add insult to injury it's a beautiful, cool spring day out after nearly a week of unseasonably low temperatures and constant drizzle.  But there I was, doing my civic duty by sitting in this converted block of jail cells turned conference room with a very varied slice of humanity slouching in office chairs. Even worse was the educational film "We the Jury: the basics of court proceedings" that we were forced to watch.

Believe it or not, I'm pretty sure I covered how a jury works at some point during my 5 years of study in criminal justice and criminology.

Of course I know that a jury is an important part of the court process and that the system could not function without citizens serving on juries in both criminal and civil cases. I am, however, not sure I'm the best person for the job. After so much exposure to the criminal justice system through classes, studies and internships I am in now way impartial and unbiased. I've written papers on the ineffectiveness of courts. I've interned with the state police. I've blatantly said that, 9 times out of 10, I'll probably take the side of the state in any criminal proceeding (and I really feel, at least sometimes, that defendants are probably guilty of something if they are there in the first place). I'm getting my doctorate in criminal justice for crying out loud!

I know too much about the field. I am a prosecutor's dream and a defense attorney's worst nightmare.  I'd make a terrible juror.

Lucky for me (and those involved in any of the three cases I could have been selected for), the judges presiding today were not ready to pool a jury, so I was freed from the possibility of sitting through voir dire (jury selection procession) and will not have to serve on an actual jury and sit through a trial. I was released with the thanks of the state, and I practically sprinted out of there.

After all, doesn't it make you feel all warm and fuzzy knowing that your time is worth $5 and a free cup of coffee?

The Shoe Review!

So in preparation for Disney I have gone a little crazy with my shopping habit. First I needed a new top... the I realized I don't have any shorts... then I saw this cute sundress... and then, one morning at 4 a.m., I decided to buy these shoes.

For my family, shoes for Disney are as important as the boarding passes for our flights. We live by a tried and true Disney motto: this is an investment in fun. We are nonstop, all out, early mornings, late nights, all over the place kind of vacationers. And when you are on the go all the time, you better have comfy shoes. When you go to Disney you can walk miles a day without realizing it, but if your shoes aren't comfy you will be miserable every step of the way. So as far as I'm concerned, it's worth the money to buy a good pair of shoes that can handle loads of walking, standing, and manhandling through airport security and still look good on the other side.

After some deliberation and lots of research, I choose this pair of Crocs Malindi in oyster. Unlike the Crocs you usually see, these are not hideously ugly but actually pretty cute; they look like a ballet flat with a thicker sole, and once you wear them for a while you forget about them. Your body heat molds the shoe material to your foot, making it a custom fit as your feet swell over the course of the day. And while your feet may sweat in these (my only complaint) the material is anti-microbial, so no smell at all. In fact, they are so easy to pull on and off you can rinse them in cold water, throw them back on and keep going in seconds. And if they get dirty? Soap an water and they'll look like you just pulled them out of the box.

And I also love Zappos.  Free shipping both ways, great customer service, great prices, and quick deliveries? Sign me up for all of my online shoe shopping needs!

Considering how your feet can swell on airplanes, in the heat, or with extended standing, the flexibility and cushioning of these shoes is a great plus. In fact, I am so in love with these shoes I recommended them to my cousin Opossum who will be joining us, yes, in Disney!

I highly recommend these flats for $30. They are cute, comfy, and perfect for traveling and lots of walking. You can see a Zappos review video here.

I LIKE:

Malindi by
Crocs

It's a small world...

It's official... I'm going to Disney World! My family's group of twelve members of my family, including Super Boy, will be going for a week of fun, relaxation, good food and adventure. It's an absolute dream come true for me I've loved Disney World ever since I first went as a two-year old, and nothing has changed in the 21 years since then. For the first installment of get-ready-for-vacation videos, our hotel... the Polynesian!