(Merry) Moment of Joy

Merry Christmas Eve, everyone! I guess you can tell that I haven't been around the blog-o-sphere lately, but I'm back with this adorable holiday greeting from friends with fins. Wishing you and yours a happy and healthy holiday season...

Moment of Joy

I stumbled across this randomly today, and it made me smile. For that reason alone I think it's worth sharing with others. Be a happy bird! Find your french fry!

Now this is culture!

I recently downloaded all of Shakespeare's sonnets from the Listening Library for free! So obviously I am revisiting my glory days of Shakespeare plays and Ms. Czekaj's class, thinking about the annual "I Love My Willy... Shakespeare" performance.

Who says grad students have no class?

Moment of Joy

Wait a minute... it's November?!?! But... what happened to October? You see, this is what I get for ignoring the entire month of September and pretending it doesn't exists; suddenly the end of the year sneaks up on you.

Anyway, I thought I'd post a Moment of Joy from waaaaay back. Now that I think about it, this picture is 6 years old. Holy crow! How did I get so old?!?!

This is from a series of pictures I took during my first semester of my undergrad career, a bright eyed and bushy tailed freshman. I loved that lake on campus. I spent a lot of time walking or just sitting by it, watching the geese and red-winged black birds, the beaver or just the way the water rippled in the wind. It sounds overly poetic, but I just liked being very still and watching things by the lake.

So here is an autumnal photo from years ago. I bet if I were by that lake now, it'd look very much the same.

Overheard and out of context...

From an evening out at a bar... with my professors...

"Are...you... ON A TRAIN?!?!"
"Oh, him? We just call him f*ck face..."
"Let's drunk dial criminologists."
"Sherman? Eck? Wiesburd? They're my b!tches."
"This is grad school. You get drunk, then go teach class. Trust me, now one will notice..."
"Happy birthday, @sshole."
"You  want a lemon drop? Don't be a biznatch."
"Dude, some of the bitches here can out drink you."
"I'm not here to be equal to the patriarchy, I'm here to overthrow it... are you going to finish those nachos?"

And this isn't even the best of them... those are... well... better left unsaid.

Maybe my life doesn't suck as much as I thought...

Yeah, yeah, I know...

Bad, grad student, bad! Where have all the posts gone? What happened to September? Where are all the snarky comments? What about my Moments of Joy? Where have you been?

Honestly? I hate September. It's nice in theory, summer fading into autumn, school bells and bright red apples. But in reality? It sucks. It's not summer, it's not fall, you are so not ready to get back into the swing of classes and papers and exams and the month kind of creeps by in limbo. It's not one thing, it's not the other, and now it's over.

Let's move on.

Besides ignoring the month of September I've been studying for the dreaded Qualifier (yes, it's so terrifying it gets capitalized), the exam that will make of break my career. Seriously. If I fail this exam (ok, ok, so if I fail it twice, but still!) I am no longer a doctoral student. I'd need to beg (yes, literally) to get back into the program. I don't think I could bear the shame of failing this test. I keep joking about throwing myself into the nearest river, but I think I might actually do it... then again, the nearest river is filled with industrial waste, so I'd probably jump in and be able to walk upon the crust that's formed over the top... where was I?

Oh yes, big test, not blogging because I am studying, need to pass.

Oh, and it's in 11 days. Not that I'm counting or anything...

Small, Fuzzy Buddha

I'm not entirely sure what it is, but I admire it's zen. It's like a little monk, or a furry Buddha. I think he'd be a great family pet, or maybe more like a spiritual adviser. He just exudes inner peace...

Incidentally, the featured camelid at the end of this video is lovely. I'd love to knit a sweater from that fiber, but I feel like they'd object. Now if I made a sweater for them...



*UPDATE* Speaking of camelids... see that little guy at the end? The one who awkwardly face-plants into the ground? Yeah... that pretty much describes my first day back at grad school...

Moment of Joy

For some reason this picture just tickled my fancy. It makes me smile for so many reasons!

My mom still will catch my bare feet and play piggies with me. And the picture itself... that little piggy nose! That impossibly tiny puppy! It's sweet with a touch of sarcasm.

I hardly know what I want more: a BLT or my own micro-piglet.

Can I live here?

 Anyone who's read this blog knows I am... reluctant at best to grow up. So the City of Isahaya is particularly alluring to me. I don't speak the language, have no friends or family there, and I'd have no where to live.

But look at this bus stop!

I mean how cute is this little strawberry hut? It's enough to make me admire public transportation. Even better? The city has a whole bunch of adorable fruit huts on bus routes all over the city. Check them out here to see all of the designs...

In a (word?)... SQUEE!

Fresh, fast and fantastic!

Here's a great summer recipe for those hot nights when you don't want to spent a lot of time in the kitchen but want something fresh and seasonal. With the abundance of tomatoes and basil from Papa's garden, and my new incredible immersion blender with food processing attachment (Thanks, Aunt Squeak!), I have made this impromptu recipe several times this summer. From start to finish, I can have dinner on the table in under half an hour.

Simple Summer Sauce
14 oz Diced tomatoes, or about 5 or 6 tomatoes from the garden
1/2 Large carrot
3 cloves of garlic
2 small onion
Handful of fresh basil leaves
Olive oil

1 lb pasta
Salted water for boiling

First set a pot of cold, salted water to boil.When at a rolling boil, cook pasta according to directions.

 Meanwhile, using a food processor, chop the onion, garlic and carrots until very fine. Heat some olive oil in a pan and quickly saute mixed vegetables.  Chiffonade the basil and toss it into the pan. When the onions are a little translucent (5 minutes, tops) add the tomatoes, stir and cover. Allow to simmer until the pasta is ready. Once the pasta is drained, add to the sauce pan and toss until evenly covered.

Serve it up and enjoy!

Moment of Joy

One thing I noticed while traveling the UK a few years ago was that, even though the majority of the homes and flats had little in the way of land so to speak, that was no deterrent to the pragmatic and determined Brits and Scots from growing a garden in everything from window boxes to planters to plots of ground no bigger than a lawn chair.

And best of all? Each was unique, perfect and absolutely gorgeous. A rather impressive feat in my mind, especially since I can barely keep my mint plant from committing suicide (more on that sad story to follow)...

This picture happens to be one of my all time favorites!

Crockpot Beef Stew

Rabbit Rabbit!

My maternal grandfather, Papa, has always been an inspiration to me; my earliest memories of him are in the kitchen, tasting whatever he was cooking. There is no meal in the world more delectable than Papa's broccoli-rabe, beef stew and his own invention, potato pie. My offhanded, handful of  this, handful of that cooking style is a direct result of watching him throw whatever is on hand into a pot and creating something spectacular.

My quest into graduate school is also inspired by him. When I was little I was slightly awed by him and how he can talk about any subject with authority. He tells the most incredible stories about his childhood, time in the Navy, career as a police officer and everything in between. When I was in college and studying the court system he'd lend be books on Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes and landmark Supreme Court decisions. His passion for learning and desire for me to get the best education possible is one of the main reasons I went to grad school.

Consider this improvised beef stew recipe as an ode to Papa and a learning experience!

Crockpot Beef Stew
1 pound of cubed beef stew meat (or more if desired)
4 large potatoes
4 cloves garlic, chopped or pressed
1 tbs paprika (I don't have it on hand and usually substitute with taco seasoning)
2 tbs soy sauce (or Worcestershire)
1 onion, chopped
1 1/2 cups beef broth (or whatever, bullion and water works, too)
1 cup wine (red or white, you pick)
2 carrots, cut into sticks (or chopped in a food processor to save you time)
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 cup homemade tomato sauce (or 4 chopped fresh tomatoes)
Grind to a Salt (have you noticed I love this stuff?)
Freshly ground black pepper
Some flour

Combine broth, wine, soy sauce, tomatoes, brown sugar, paprika, some seasoned salt and pepper in the slow cooker and set to high (4-6 hours cook time) or low (8-10 hours cook time) depending on when you want to eat.

Wash, peel and chop potatoes, carrots, onion and garlic. Throw them into the broth.

Take your stew meat and put it into a zip-lock bag. Sprinkle some flour over it and salt and pepper it a bit. Close the bag and give it a good shake to coat the meat (or, in the words of Weasel, "Shake it like a Polaroid picture!"). Throw this in the fridge for a few minutes while you drag out a frying pan and add just enough olive oil to coat the bottom on the pan and let the flame heat it up on high. Toss in the now coated meat and saute until nice and brown. It doesn't have to be cooked all the way, because  you will now throw it into the slow cooker with all the rest to continue cooked. Make sure the pot is covered, and walk away (cocktails, anyone?).

Enjoy!

Note: The measurements in this recipe are arbitrary. I usually just pour, sprinkle, toss and add according to my whim, what I have in the fridge, and what kind of flavor I am looking for. The beauty of this method? I have a base recipe I can work with, and I also have the freedom to experiment!

Summer Salad

There is something wonderful about a simple, chilled salad on a hot day. I have been tinkering around the kitchen and have, through reviewing some recipes and much  invention on my part, created a great cucumber salad for picnics, barbecues or anytime you want a taste of summer.

The delicate taste of chilled cucumber  is the prefect compliment to a little bite of onion and fresh ground pepper. And, because of the ingredients I ultimately chose, this is a completely fat free dish!

Summer Cucumber Salad
3 medium to large cucumbers
1/2 an onion, yellow or red will do
Splash of white vinegar  (honestly, just splash it on there...)
1/4 cup fat free sour cream
1/2 cup Miracle Whip Free
Fresh ground pepper to taste (I like to go a little heavy handed here)
Simply Organic's Grind to a Salt to taste (again, I love this and add it to everything...)

Start by peeling the cucumbers and roughly chopping them into bite size pieces. Chop the onion very fine (my lovely new immersion blend with the food processor attachment makes quick work of this, so I recommend getting one). Put in all in a bowl and splash some white vinegar on there. Let it sit for half an hour. Go do something else. Have a cocktail...

After your cocktail- I mean the half hour- is finished, pour off the excess liquid and transfer all of your veggies into a colander or mesh strainer. Sit this on top of the bowl you just used, and let it continue to drain for at least a half hour, although I like to give it a little longer. Again, go have a cocktail.

Take the strainer off the bowl, pour out the excess liquid, and throw everything back in (if you've been having cocktails be careful here, or it'll end up on the counter...). Now add your pepper and Grind to a Salt, and you can use as little or as much as you want. As there is such a great quantity, the light, freshness of the cucumber is unlikely to be overwhelmed and will highlighted by the added spice. Add your fat free sour cream and Miracle Whip Free, mix, and throw into fridge to chill until needed. At least and hour, or more, whatever.

Congratulate yourself with a snack, or another cocktail, I don't judge.

Enjoy!

Note: The measurements for the sour cream and light mayo is variable. I typically don't even measure, just spoon it on there. Even the quantities of cucumbers and onion can be played with, but I recommend a ration of about 3:1/2 in order to keep the flavors fresh and not overly onion-y.

Project Hera: On Hold

Darn, and just when I was really getting into it, too! I'm sorry to say that Project Hera has been postponed for at least a few weeks, but at least with good cause.

It turns out that Weasel needed the book more than I do. As we pack her and her spinning wheel off to college, she's really worried that she won't make friends, won't fit in, isn't attractive... all fears I can debunk in about half a second, but let's face it: hearing it and believing it are totally separate things.

As much as I want to just sit Weasel down and tell her that in college there are no popular kids, and the people who were losers in high school meet all the other losers from high school and suddenly no one is a loser anymore and you have friends who know and love you. Hey, I met Super Boy the first day of college, so anything is possible!

But Weasel needs to learn all of this for herself. And I want her to feel as confident and self-assured as possible, so my copy of Seven Days to Sex Appeal is now (temporarily) in her hands. What does she hope to gain from it? Well, that's her business, but I get the feeling that, like me sadly, she just needs a boost in her assertiveness, self-confidence and just become more aware of herself in general.

So go forth and learn Weasel, and who knows? Maybe you can teach me a thing or two!

Go, Grandpa, Go!

The human spirit is an incredible thing. It survives and thrives through unimaginable horror, and yet in life you often see glimpses of triumph in tragedy. If you think  I am getting a little melodramatic, take a look at this video.

That sweet old man dancing to Gloria Gaynor with his grown grand-kids survived the Holocaust, and not only did he survive, he had a family who, many years later, joined him in a trip across Europe to visit camps and memorials.

And they danced.

Some critics have called this video offensive and disrespectful to the memory of these places. I disagree. In fact, I think this is a heartfelt, beautiful tribute to the joy of life, the power of faith and love, and the unconquerable human spirit...

"You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed 

my sackcloth and clothed me with joy..."   

Psalms, 30:11

Project Hera: Day 2

On today's agenda: walking and standing. And I have to say,  I am not entirely sold on the lessons in Seven Days to Sex Appeal. Part of it is my own fault: the book aims to help women increase their sex appeal first, and their confidence second. These goals are often achieved by looking vulnerable, helpless, or very... available, for lack of a better word. I am trying to use this book to become more assertive and confident, so a lot of these tips and tricks are overly sexual for my needs.

But regardless, here's what I have learned. When it comes to walking, you have to swing your hips. Step with one foot, swing your hip to that side, and then lift your other heel. I think. I tried this a couple of times (in heels, be cause they really do make your butt look fantastic), but I felt awkward. And not just awkward because I was trying something new, but awkwardness because I felt that what I was doing was obvious. This wasn't just subtly upping sex appeal, this was blatant hey-look-at-me sexy.

Not workplace appropriate...

Stance and hand placement is just as important as being conscious of how you walk. For my purposes, maybe even more important.  By putting all of the weight on one foot and resting just the ball of your other foot nest to it (with a little knee bend), you can then hold your hands behind you on the small of your back. This will automatically improve your posture, through your shoulders back and subtly raise your chest. Your hips are also push forward, minimizing the belly and rounding the bum. Nice and cute, attractive but not super sexy.The pose I like best is perfect for work, assertive but feminine. You again put all of your weight on one foot, but this time you place the second to the side, slightly past your shoulder. You do the same thing with the arms, but this look is more serious than cute.

You can also place a hand on your hip to emphasize the curves of your body, but hand placement is key. If you put your thumb on your hip and fan your fingers over your butt, this is a super-hot-come-and-get-me signal. Not something I plan on trying and time soon. But when you reverse it, thumb on butt, fingers curling over the hip, it's appealing but not vulnerable or delicate. 

What did I take away from this chapter? High heels (especially comfy ones) make you feel confident and your butt look...well, perky. And the whole business of stance and hand placement is useful to remember. The caveat (as always)? There's a fine line between what you can pull off on a date and what's okay for work...

Moment of Joy

Lacking the energy to tackle a Project Hera lesson I am simply offering the world a cute puppy today.

This is probably a better use of my time anyhow...

Project Hera: Day 1

I have dubbed my experiment in assertiveness and gender signals "Project Hera." If haven't brushed up on your Greek mythology recently,  Hera was the wife of Zeus, the king of the gods, and had a reputation for both beauty and her temper. Unlike Aphrodite, the beautiful but vapid goddess of love, Hera was both beautiful and strong willed. Case in point: she had a history of turning her husbands many mistresses into farm animals to prove a point.

Not there's a lady to admire...

Anyway, today's adventures in sex appeal and confidence focused on something I am already very conscious of  and working hard to improve: my posture.

I slouched a lot as a kid because I was taller than most girls and I wanted to fit it, and now my bad habit, combined with a curvy figure, ends up making my look about 15 lbs heavier than I really am. So after reading the first chapter I put the lessons into practice... at the local Sam's Club.

Well, it could be worse...

What did I learn? Standing up straight, chin parallel to the floor with the pelvis forward (to make your bottom perky and tummy flat) is a lot harder than it sounds. I also felt very self conscious, as if curling my spine over myself makes me invisible somehow (hmmm... insightful, no?). It did, however, help me in some respects. Salespeople noticed me quicker than usual, and they were more willing to help me.

So today's results indicate that they way I carry myself might actually help to make favorable first impressions. It will take practice, however, until I am comfortable applying these techniques.

More adventures to come...

Note: there are also lessons in the first chapter on how different sitting positions can be sexy, assertive, feminines, etc... but it was way too complicated as far as I'm concerned. Maybe I'll revisit it later.

Because I am not sexy...

I have a confession to make: I am not hot. I am not particularly thin, my face is not particularly beautiful, and I don't know what to do with hair and clothing. Yes, I do have clinically diagnosed body dysmorphic disorder, but regardless, I am still convinced that, although I am told I am pretty, I do not see myself in that way and I do not think I attract positive attention.

It also doesn't help that I have low self-esteem or confidence.

In an effort to make me feel better about myself, Super Boy recommended  I buy this book, not so much as to be "sexier" but more assertive and confident in social situations, which, if you are a habitual reader, you know I am not.

So this is my seven day experiment: I will practice one of the lessons every few days and report my findings. If nothing else, this could be a fascinating read on the power of body language...

Moment of Joy

I don't know how I feel about this new pop culture fashion trend, but the UK's Daily Mail had a whole spread on dog dyeing. Retrievers become tigers. Chows become pandas. Pomeranian become... smaller pandas.

Hope you enjoy, because I'm not sure if these pups do...

Don't mess with my magic...

It's hard to believe but it's already been one month since Super Boy and I hopped on a plane and went to Disney. Everyone one who went, from (the now slightly more likable) Gavone to my sisters Lady Diva and Weasel, from my mom and dad to my cousin, Opossum, and Aunt Squeak, everyone still raves about how much fun it was, how incredible the adventures, and how soon we must return.

In fact, it was a frequent topic of discussion this weekend when we were all reassembled at my parents home for a family weekend celebrating Weasel's graduation. And in between looking at pictures (again and again) and reliving our glory days in the sun, we also had some rather philosophical discussions on propriety, manners, and what is appropriate when in public.

The conversation centered on the final day we spent in Disney, spent mostly in the Magic Kingdom. It was the appointed "Gay Day" at the park; LGBTQ individuals, family and groups  had spent the week in the surrounding area outside the park and help events in Disney and elsewhere, a sort of meet and greet vacation. That day it was a trip to the Magic Kingdom they planned, and thousands of people in red shirts (the color of the day, I assume, there's no other explanation) poured off the monorail and into the park.

Other than the increased crowd, it usually wouldn't have bothered my family in the least. When you live in a family like mine, you tend to have a very relaxed "live and let live" mentality about these kinds of things. It would even be worth mentioning if it hadn't been for the shirts.

Those red shirts. Some of them have really cute saying on them, like "I believe in fairies!" But others were, if not offensive, then at least incredibly inappropriate in a children and family friendly environment. Some said things like "Fag" and "Hag," which would be difficult to explain to a child, but others were outright and blatantly sexual, like "Single: form line in rear" and "Big Bear Boy" (not explaining that one, look it up yourself).

 Here's the issue: Your business is your business, but when you are out in public, especially at a place like Disney, which is specifically designed for children and families, you need to keep in mind what's appropriate for the situation. Night club? Wear the leather chaps. Disney? Stick to the glittery fairy wings and magic wands.

My biggest hang up about all this? I wish I had wings like that...

What you need to know about your physician assistant student...

I'm fairly certain I've mentioned the Super Boy is studying to become a physician assistant but I never told you that he's a blogger, too. In fact, his blog on pre-physician assistant students has become quite popular in some circles!

While offering unique insights into the student experience, however, he has neglected to discuss what the experience is like for those around them, especially family and significant others. This, I feel, warrants some information,explanation and advice on my part, as I am very well aware how grueling this program can be...

You'll be alone even if you are sitting in the same room as your student. This might be the hardest part. A student can be so focused on their work for hours at a time, every night for weeks, until you might as well be in a room by yourself. You might also get more conversation by talking to yourself, too. I haven't found a good way to combat this feeling yet, but I think it's worth knowing about. The best advice I can offer on this point is to make sure our student sets aside some time for activities that you both enjoy and can participate in without thinking about your workloads. Quality time is scare, so use it wisely!

You'll be taken for granted, even if they don't mean to. I have seen Super Boy take a plate of dinner I'd spent hours making and start to tuck in without ever taking his eyes off of his computer screen and his radiology scans. He'll drop dirty scrubs and clothes and books all over the apartment I'd spent all day cleaning. And yeah, it makes me mad, but I know he doesn't mean to do it. His head is so full of pharmacology, H&P's,  and anatomy that he's drained at the end of the day and blind to a lot of the little things that are happening in the background. Try not to take it too personally, but gently point these things out if they are really bothering you.

Be patient and supportive with your student, but don't hesitate to give them a swift and loving kick in the pants if they start to get snippy with you or too critical of themselves. It takes a lot of faith to wade through all the dysfunction, and you need to be there to act as a guinea pig for their physical exams, quiz-masters for flashcards and general cheerleader when their spirits get down. But it's just as important they you do not let them take their frustration and anxiety out on you, and it's counter productive to let them beat up on themselves. Be firm, positive, honest and assure them that everything will be okay.

The good times will be really good. I know I might sound like this is a miserable, heartbreaking program, and some days it can be, but when things are good they are really good. For instance, when Super Boy and I were in Disney World, we were so deliriously happy and spent every moment together. The fact that the week was sandwiched between very busy weeks made it all the more special. You can expect every day to be a fairy tale, but the fairy tales you do have are extra sweet!

I hope this gives some comfort and insight to those who love physician assistant students, and who knows? Maybe I'll get Super Boy to be a guest blogger and offer his side of the story...

Feminism and Common Sense

Super Boy came home with an interesting story last night. During a lecture the presenter was drawing parallels between offering medical care to teenage boys and girls. Whereas a boy will give you barely audible one word answers, a teenage girl will not only tell you what hurts, but everything else that's happened in the last month!

This exaggeration provides a useful caricature; guys may say too little, and girls may say more than you need. And it was the effective use of generalization as a teaching tool that makes the comparison so resonant; I doubt anyone in the lecture will forget the examples given.

Not everyone, however, saw these generalizations in their intended light. One individual in particular took such offense that, after writing swear words all over her lecture notes, stormed out of the room an refused to return until the lecturer had left for the day. This whole show was done in the name of "feminism;" apparently, drawing a comparison between men and women was a slur against females in general, and was perceived as a great insult.

This is where I begin to question wisdom of letting beliefs grow so strong that they begin to cloud reason and common sense. I have strong beliefs, too. I think everybody does in some way. But I firmly believe that just because I feel a certain way about things that I have the right to rub anyone's nose in it. And that's what this girl did: she allowed her feelings about feminism overrule common manners such as paying attention in class and showing respect to professors. She even did herself a disservice in leaving a lecture and handicapping her education.

The moral I find in this story? Believe in what you think is right, be it regarding faith, politics or other hot topics. Stand up for your beliefs. But don't let them cloud your common sense.

Words of wisdom...

As you go throughout life, remember that you'll have good days, you'll have bad days, and in the end things will probably be okay.

And some days you get the be the raptor, and others you're just the cheerleader...

Enjoy!

Moment of Joy

Happy summer! On this beautiful official-first-day I can't help but look out of my windows at all of the sunshine and think about beaches, sunbathing, mini-vacations and doing nothing. The freedom and relaxation are certainly welcome!

To celebrate, here is a little video I stumbled across. I think it pretty much sums up my enthusiasm today!

Creation and Inspiration

I am back from a incredible week in Disney World (posts to follow!) and I am now inspired to get active and make something. I am trying to keep criminology off the brain and unwind with other, more relaxing, pursuits. Namely, I have recently begun creating and "upcycling" (recycling, updating and improving existing pieces) jewelry pieces.

In addition to making a necklace and a locket for myself, I have just ordered beading supplies and metal findings to start creating original hat pins! This first line of products will be marketed on Esty at the Daughter Of the Roses shop and will be called "Itsy Bitsy Spyder," as it is my first and "elementary" attempt at creating art for sale!

Featured above is the logo that Super Boy created for me. I drew a sketch on a crumpled Post-It, and he turned it into art. Thank, hun!

Updates to follow as the supplies arrive and, of course, obligatory sales pitches...

War is not a game...

Super Boy and I had an argument last night, over something many might consider petty. It was about video games, which Super Boy has been exposed to from a young age and enjoys playing in moderation. I, on the other hand, never owned a video game until this year when Super Boy and I bought a Wii, and I don't necessarily see what the allure is. To make matters worse, we don't see eye-to-eye on what games we want in our home, specifically one called "Call of Duty 3."

This video game puts the player in the middle of WWII, sending them on missions with weapons and comrades and enemies and lots and lots of blood.  Unlike many anti-video game people, it's not the blood and violence of the video game I object to, but rather the subject matter: how can people profit off one of the bloodiest wars in human history? Why is WWII reduced to a video game?

And why are we as a society okay with this?

 War is often treated as something remote and sterile in video games, making it more fantasy and fiction than a harsh reality. In addition to treating war as a game, society uses days set aside for remembering veterans and offering thanks as excuses for shopping. Memorial Day? Veteran's Day? They are now more about retail than remembering.

Think about it: would we treat 9/11 in this way? Would our culture look at these video games the same way if you could play the first-person role of a terrorist, or a passenger on Flight 93? Would we be okay if  retail stores offer 9.11% off all patio furniture for three days only? If these suggestions offend you, good. They offend me, too. And the treatment of WWII or any war as a source of entertainment or commerce is no different. I think we need to get our priorities straight.

And, perhaps most important of all, you can't restart the game if you are killed in a real war, and nobody throws a sale in your honor.

Moment of Joy

The day is near! It might seem silly or juvenile, but for my family Disney World truly is the happiest place on earth. And this Saturday we are on our way...

Super Boy and I are particularly  excited to go; it's not just a vacation to us. It's not just pop culture and cartoon characters. It's more than just hanging by a pool or going on rides. To us, it's symbolic in a way, as ridiculous as it may seem. It's about our families, and happiness, and laughing. It's about silliness, pure joy, and leaving stress and worries behind, if only for a few days.

For us, Disney brings together all of the best things of life...

So while we pack, beg our friends for rides to and from the airport, and checking and double checking our flight status, we keep one things in mind: we're going to the happiest place on earth, and for a few days, all the world is right!

Not many days left...

An Esty Review!

Spring is always a busy time of year in my family, with Mother's Day, my sister Weasel's birthday, my birthday and Father's day all falling within weeks of each other. And, of course, I end up buying many presents, mostly online as I am a graduate student short on time and money.

This does not mean, however, that I cut corners of gift giving! I have found Esty, the handmade and vintage community offering all kinds of fantastic goods and supplies imaginable. With a wide range of prices and an unlimited selection of beautiful things, picking out gifts has become a dangerous task: I often buy more for myself and others than I originally intend.

My first Esty purchase was from Little Bird Design UK, a fantastic Edinburgh based Esty shop that specializes in beautiful paper goods. These pictures are just a small glimpse of journal I gave my mother on Mother's Day and the photos hardly do it justice.

The variety of journals at Little Bird Design UK is astonishing. In all kinds of patterns and prints, from sedate to extravagant, and in all kinds of textures and styles. The attention to detail, from paper selection of the fine hand stitching on the binding, is the mark of a true artist.

There is even, I kid you not, a journal shaped like a cupcake. Heavenly!

 For anyone searching for a unique and truly personal gift, I highly recommend the products of Little Bird Design UK.

In fact, forget about gifts... once you see these works of art you'll want one for yourself!

See for yourself here, the Esty home of these delights!

Moment of Joy

Bonus post of the day!

I know I've already offered a critique of the jury selection process for today, but I'm a nice person and wanted to share this video, too. In a belated tribute to Mother's Day and moms everywhere, I give you the Adventures of Baby Cats and Mom Cat.

This video actually reminds me of my mom. Whenever I end up sliding and and need help getting back on my own paws, my mom is always there to lift me by the scruff of the neck and lovingly carry me back to safety.

Or something to that effect...

So here's to you mom, with much love and many meows.

Serving the State: the perils of jury duty

I often joke about how I am not ready to be a grown up and I'd much rather hide under my bed all day. I am without a doubt 5 years-old at heart, and I'd like nothing more the spend the first few days of summer vacation in my pajamas eating ice pops and watching Disney movies. Unfortunately, in the eyes of the state at least, I am  most definitely a grown up and therefore I am required to serve the state in the most irritating and mind numbingly boring ways possible.

I am now eligible to sit as a juror.

In an incredible stroke of irony, I was called to serve on a jury today, just days after I finished my last exam.The little form came in the mail, and, under penalty of being held in contempt of court, I went to the county courthouse this morning and settled in for a long, boring day. Summer break would just have to be put on hold. Armed with snacks and a few novels, I watched the criminal justice system unfold in front of me, and boy is it ugly.

To add insult to injury it's a beautiful, cool spring day out after nearly a week of unseasonably low temperatures and constant drizzle.  But there I was, doing my civic duty by sitting in this converted block of jail cells turned conference room with a very varied slice of humanity slouching in office chairs. Even worse was the educational film "We the Jury: the basics of court proceedings" that we were forced to watch.

Believe it or not, I'm pretty sure I covered how a jury works at some point during my 5 years of study in criminal justice and criminology.

Of course I know that a jury is an important part of the court process and that the system could not function without citizens serving on juries in both criminal and civil cases. I am, however, not sure I'm the best person for the job. After so much exposure to the criminal justice system through classes, studies and internships I am in now way impartial and unbiased. I've written papers on the ineffectiveness of courts. I've interned with the state police. I've blatantly said that, 9 times out of 10, I'll probably take the side of the state in any criminal proceeding (and I really feel, at least sometimes, that defendants are probably guilty of something if they are there in the first place). I'm getting my doctorate in criminal justice for crying out loud!

I know too much about the field. I am a prosecutor's dream and a defense attorney's worst nightmare.  I'd make a terrible juror.

Lucky for me (and those involved in any of the three cases I could have been selected for), the judges presiding today were not ready to pool a jury, so I was freed from the possibility of sitting through voir dire (jury selection procession) and will not have to serve on an actual jury and sit through a trial. I was released with the thanks of the state, and I practically sprinted out of there.

After all, doesn't it make you feel all warm and fuzzy knowing that your time is worth $5 and a free cup of coffee?

What I've learned in grad school... so far

Summer has officially begun! Break out the margaritas, stuff the criminology books under the bed and let's head to the beach!

In all seriousness, it's been a long year, but I can honestly say that I have finished my first year of grad school and I did it well. I have, of course, learned a great deal about criminological theory, policing and statistics. But the greatest lessons I have learned have very little to do with academic.

So without further ado, the top three things I've learned in grad school:

3. When in doubt be vague. Didn't read that article? Didn't understand that last stats problem? Have no idea what your professor is asking you? Be vague. Start with "Well, there are several theories regarding that..." and end with "... but of course, there are different ways to see this." And if all else fails, smile blandly and say that you were wondering about that too, and what did the professor think about that? It just wasn't clear...

2. You can stand a lot more than you realize. From filthy roommates to 10 page papers weekly, you can get through a lot more dysfunction that you think. It takes planning, it takes patience, and it takes a whole lot of reminding yourself that everything works out in the end. This mantra, "everything will be okay," has kept me sane. And in the end, you actually get a lot more work done when you keep your eye on the big picture.

1. By far the most important thing I've learned in grad school... when it's done it's done. Like reminding yourself that everything works out in the end, letting go of perfection and instead focusing on getting things just done and done well enough is freeing. It's not about doing a job half way or not caring about assignments. Instead, it encourages getting things done, and done well, without going overboard and driving yourself nuts. And sometimes it's better to just finish a project than slave over it and worry.

It's been a long, stressful, busy year and I've busted my butt to get everything in order. But the greatest lesson of all is to trust in yourself, and trust in the higher powers in the world to get you through.

Please excuse our mess...

In honor of my last exam of the year I have decided to start a project to keep me busy over the summer. Namely, I'll be personalizing this blog and designing layouts  and such that reflect me rather than the generic blogger option. So in the meantime please ignore any strange texts, oddly placed photos or icky html codes...

I'm working on it...

Moment of Joy

So I am in the middle of my finals, and in less than a week I will have completed my first year as criminal justice doctoral student. If I ever needed a pick me up, it's now... so in honor of the last statistic exam I will ever (hopefully) have to take, I give you a silly video.

Enjoy!

The Shoe Review!

So in preparation for Disney I have gone a little crazy with my shopping habit. First I needed a new top... the I realized I don't have any shorts... then I saw this cute sundress... and then, one morning at 4 a.m., I decided to buy these shoes.

For my family, shoes for Disney are as important as the boarding passes for our flights. We live by a tried and true Disney motto: this is an investment in fun. We are nonstop, all out, early mornings, late nights, all over the place kind of vacationers. And when you are on the go all the time, you better have comfy shoes. When you go to Disney you can walk miles a day without realizing it, but if your shoes aren't comfy you will be miserable every step of the way. So as far as I'm concerned, it's worth the money to buy a good pair of shoes that can handle loads of walking, standing, and manhandling through airport security and still look good on the other side.

After some deliberation and lots of research, I choose this pair of Crocs Malindi in oyster. Unlike the Crocs you usually see, these are not hideously ugly but actually pretty cute; they look like a ballet flat with a thicker sole, and once you wear them for a while you forget about them. Your body heat molds the shoe material to your foot, making it a custom fit as your feet swell over the course of the day. And while your feet may sweat in these (my only complaint) the material is anti-microbial, so no smell at all. In fact, they are so easy to pull on and off you can rinse them in cold water, throw them back on and keep going in seconds. And if they get dirty? Soap an water and they'll look like you just pulled them out of the box.

And I also love Zappos.  Free shipping both ways, great customer service, great prices, and quick deliveries? Sign me up for all of my online shoe shopping needs!

Considering how your feet can swell on airplanes, in the heat, or with extended standing, the flexibility and cushioning of these shoes is a great plus. In fact, I am so in love with these shoes I recommended them to my cousin Opossum who will be joining us, yes, in Disney!

I highly recommend these flats for $30. They are cute, comfy, and perfect for traveling and lots of walking. You can see a Zappos review video here.

I LIKE:

Malindi by
Crocs

It's a small world...

It's official... I'm going to Disney World! My family's group of twelve members of my family, including Super Boy, will be going for a week of fun, relaxation, good food and adventure. It's an absolute dream come true for me I've loved Disney World ever since I first went as a two-year old, and nothing has changed in the 21 years since then. For the first installment of get-ready-for-vacation videos, our hotel... the Polynesian!

BBQ Time!

Gorgeous weather like we've been having in my neck of the woods always makes me think about sunny days at the beach, the small of sunscreen and sand, and, of course, Okie's. I have spent at least part of every summer on Long Beach Island in New Jersey, home of great surf, great memories, and a great deli.

Okie's Butcher Shop not only has the best burgers and hot dogs on the island (or anywhere, as far as I'm concerned) but they also have the best potato salad. I introduced Super Boy to Okie's a few years ago and he's just as hooked as I am. And let's face it, it's just about impossible not to love red skinned potato salad that amazing. So In honor of springtime and the beginning of beach season, I present my very own potato salad recipe, created through trial and error in hopes of capturing Okie's flavor. It may not be Okie's, but I think it's pretty darn good!

If you try the recipe, please leave me a message in the comment's section. I'd love to get some feed back. 

Oh, and yes, that is a giant wooden cow on their roof.

Surf City Potato Salad
3 lbs red skinned potatoes
Kosher salt (to salt boiling water)
1 cup Miracle Whip Free
2 tablespoons of spicy brown mustard
Freshly ground black pepper (give it a good 5 or 6 turns)
Simply Organic's "grind to a salt" seasoning blend* (another 5 or 6 turns)
1 stick celery chopped fine
1 small yellow onion chopped fine

Scrub your potatoes and place them in a pot. Cover with water, add Kosher salt and bring to a boil. Once boiling, lower to a simmer and let sit for 15 minutes. Drain them into a colander, place colander over the pot and cover with a dishtowel. Let them steam like this for another 15 minutes.

Meanwhile, combine Miracle Whip, mustard, pepper and salt seasoning blend t a large bowl and mix until well combined. Toss in your chopped celery and onion at this point, and stir until everything is nice and covered.

When your potatoes are done steaming and are cool enough for you to handle, cut them into halves or quarters, depending on size, and toss them into your big bowl of dressing. Leave the skins on! Stir everything together until it's all combined and covered. Now place in the fridge and allow it to sit for a few hours until completely cold. This will allow the flavors to fully combine.

Enjoy!

Notes: I use Miracle Whip Free just to cut down on the calories, but feel free to use your favorite mayo or mayo substitute.  You can also vary your potatoes depending on what you have available or your preference.

* available at food stores like Whole Foods, etc. I use it in everything!